Patience is a virtue

[Lanabear]

Need a little help, we rescued our cat Lana, nearly a year ago, and she’s only 2. The history when we got her is a little vague, she was found in a derelict building with a litter of kittens, when we were introduced to her she was wrapped up in a towel and very, very timid.
She spent most of her first 4 months under the bed in the spare room with us going in every morning & evening chatting to her and just sitting with her, then after a little while, encouraging her to play, she finally started to respond, then over the next few months she has really come out of her shell. Just loves to play now, on our bed mainly! When we’re out during the day she’ll sleep on our bed all day. But! She will not let us stroke her, if either one of us presents our hand and she’ll come up to you, sniff it then step back, if we do push the issue she starts to raise her paw for the swipe, at which point we back off and continue play..

Is this just patience that we need or are we doing something wrong?

Of course a Vet visit is needed soon, so a bit worried about getting her into the carrier, i'll need a little advice on that too please

Thanks
Anna

[bobbys girl]

Well done you for all the effort you are putting into befriending this little girl. What on earth must she have been through to be so timid?

I've usually won over cats using food as a bribe, but I don't think that will work for you. Though it might be worth a try.

If you HAVE to take her to the vets in her current state of mind, then I suggest you do it gently but firmly by wrapping her in a towel. Any hesitation or 'faffing' about will only upset her further.

Good luck and let us know how you go on.

[Lanabear]

Thank you for coming back to me, we're really not sure what happened before she was rescued, but i guess it is just patience with her, she so sweet.

Food, she'll wait until the coast is clear for her Morning & Evening meal but she's not really into treats although she does quite like the paste and licks it from my finger so I'll try more of that, but she goes crazy for Catnip, maybe that inside the carrier?

[Ruth B]

Sounds rather like my little Freyja. We got her from a rescue about 18 months ago along with another cat that she had become friends with (we were looking for two new cats at the time) Maybe I'm a sucker for a sop story, but reading about how she had been found when she was about 12 weeks old in a taped up, tiny box, too scared to even move, and I knew I just had to have her and give her a chance at a permanent home, the rescue told me afterwards that as she was so nervous they didn't think she would ever find a home. I barely saw her when I went to choose, just a white streak going from hidey hole to hidey hole. I have now had her for over 18 months and she is just over 2 years old, and i still haven't been able to pick her up properly.

The best advise I can give is just accept it will be slow going with yours. If she likes treats (and if you haven't got a greedy guts like my Saturn) then try hand feeding her treats so she gets use to hands being associated with nice things. If she sniffs your hand and pulls away let her go, back away slowly so she can settle down again, let her know that you aren't going to force contact on her. Even if she doesn't pull away from your hand don't initiate contact straight off, watch her body language and once you think she sniffs the hand and stays relaxed try just a gentle, one finger, stroke behind the ear or just in front of the tail on her spine, these seem to be two places that most cats enjoy being stroked in. It took me months to get to the stage where Freyja would some times let me rub her behind the ear. Hopefully in time she will learn to enjoy contact.

As for the vets visit, this is where the best laid plans can go to pot. I have a top loading wire cage style carrier and have managed to get her in it 3 times using three different methods, normally after a previous appointment was cancelled due to major lacerations on both my and my husbands hands and arms.

First time I managed to coax her into the carrier using treats and a toy and then pull the lid down before she could jump out. If you have a carrier that she can use as more of a bed, some of the front loaders or fabric carriers are better for this, make her a bed in there and let her get use to it as a safe place for her. You might be able to shut her in there without a fight that way.

The second time, I penned her in the bathroom (ours is so small you could almost touch all four walls at the same time if you had four arms) and get a piece of blanket over her. Bundled her in that and then out of the bathroom door to where my husband was waiting with the basket. The vet didn't give her much of an examination that time as she was just in for a second starter vaccination, she just cleared an area of the neck and put the needle in. Unfortunately since then if I pick up a towel or a blanket she runs off.

The third time, having failed utterly with the blanket technique, (she wasn't even going near the bathroom door) and canceled one appointment, I spent the next 3 weeks getting her used to me fussing her behind the ears, which she was happy to accept. The basket was left open in the bedroom where she was happiest for me to fuss her and the appointment made for late morning surgery with the understanding that if i could catch her early I would bring her in and wait for the vet to be free. Fuss behind ears, grab scruff of neck lift turn and drop her in the carrier, support the back legs while holding her as she is rather heavier than a kitten. I knew I had one chance or it would be another phone call to cancel. That was back in May, I know have until May this year to work out how to do it a second time and to try and get her used to me handling her more.

Hopefully one of these method might work for you this time and you can work on the preparation ready for the next time.

I hope one day that Freyja will turn into a cuddly lap cat, but accept that it may never be. As long as she seems happy and I have some way of catching her to get her to the vets for boosters or treatment then that is good enough for me.

Sorry for the length of post, I seem incapable of doing short ones, when I get talking about my cats I just ramble on.

[emmab]

We are in exactly the same posiiton with Diabalo except he came out from under the bed after a week. He now lets us play with him and he sits in the same room as us. He just about lets us stroke him when distracted with food but after that he is back in his own little shell again.
We too have been there with pet carriers and vets appointments. It sounds so alike to Diabolo. We too are not sure what happened to him. He has had his ear cut into a V and apparantely refuges in France occasionally do this to identify sterilised or neutered cats which is disgraceful. He hates people so not sure if he too has been mistreated. I was given a tablet called Zylkene which reduces the stimulants in the brain and calms them down a little. He has been on this for two weeks and am sure it helps. I will see when we stop it. He also has Feliway but not sure that does anything.
The vet may be able to give you something for him as our vet does for his vet trips. It may calm them enough to make them sleepy. We used something similar when we moved and our old cat had half a tablet and it worked a treat for the journey.

[Lanabear]

Hi Guys,

Thanks so much for all the messages, I will let you all know how it goes, although we had another step on the weekend. I introduced the treat paste, which she absolutely loves! and we had alittle moment saturday and sunday, she even chirrped at me, which she has only done a couple of times before. Then she curled up next to me and went to sleep, i think i even heard a little purr!

Must be doing something right
Progress!
Ax