Cat Chat Feline Forum

Sorry to post this but tears are streaming. This mor at work at 8am a colleague asked me what I was doing for Xmas. Yes I'm going camping Xmas Day & coming home Boxing Day. The tears started Why? last year was was my 1st Xmas without my mum & this year without my darling girl Mayday. I feel so alone - no anchor - no constant & I miss my mum & Mayday so much. And on top of that I stopped to pick up my best friend the other day for the express bus to the city. While she waved me on I thought it petty to drive off. She did hop in my car but bombarded me with "How are you ... Did you go to meditation?" I told her i went to temple as meditation finished for year & spoke to a lady who showed me how to do offerings to Buddah (incense & burning a candle with a wish).

I didn't tell her that I started to cry & shake & the lady asked "have you suffered a loss?" I told them about mum, Mayday & my best friend's husband telling me in no uncertain terms "to get over it". Her reply was "Compassion is the underlying principle of Buddhisim & he must have a lot of suffering to say something like that. You own & recognise your suffering find compassion in your own mindfulness & words & judgements won't hurt you. Forgive him". I'm finding that hard! Sorry for the rambling!

Vivian

Dear Vivian,

I am so sorry to hear that you are feeling that way. This morning is going to be a bit manic, but I will pm you later if that is OK?

Sue

Sue appreciate your post & consideration. It's just after 8pm here & im in bed as I'm feeling awful. The tears just won't stop. Vivian

I'm so sorry you're feeling so low - Christmas can be a horrible time when you've suffered a loss. It just brings home all that you're missing.

The best way I know to get through is acceptance, of the loss and the way you're feeling. Things WILL improve and you WILL feel better, you just kind of have to sit it out until you do. Be kind to yourself, get lost in a book or a film if you can. (((hugs)))

Hi Sue I've just read my post in reply to your kind words & my reply sounded a bit off hand. What I meant was in thanking you for your thoughts & consideration was I'd love to hear from you when you had some time. I'm just about to leave to catch the bus for work.

And Crewella thanks for your words too. I guess everything still extremely raw atm.
I hope to catch the new Star Wars movie over the Xmas break - pure escapism!

Thanks everyone I really appreciate our chats. And (((hugs))) from me too!

Vivian

I have sent you a pm.

Me and OH are going to see Star Wars over Christmas. Must remember to take my ear plugs. I am blessed (I think?) with quite sensitive hearing and our local theatre has an awful sound system - enough to rattle your fillings!

A couple of years ago we took my mum to see Pirates of the Carribean. Mum wears a hearing aid - she had to turn it off!

Hi Sue Our movie theatre too is loud mainly with the adverts though. I'm at work but will log onto my mail now to read your msg. Vivian

I hope that you are able to overcome your losses. I will be losing my friend very soon and I am having a hard time with it. Fortunately i still have anchors (parents, wife and new daughter) and I know it will pass because I have been through it before with a dog or two, but it never gets easy. Best of luck, keep busy and keep in touch with your friends. Also when you think you are ready maybe you should find a new furry friend.